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This morning I went into town by myself for the first time since before the summer holidays. And to put it mildly, it didn’t go well.
As well as the usual minor things that go wrong, there were also several obstickals that aren’t normally there which made me completely loose my bearings trying to get round them. I was stressed to start with, this being the first time after a gap of eight weeks or so and all that unexpected stuff in the way didn’t help.
I’m fine when there’s nobody there to see me blundering around waving my cane vaguely about in the hope of locating some tactile cue I recognise. However when there are people around I always feel like a real idiot when I loose my bearings. And of course I had to end up nearly wandering onto the cycle track (luckily I felt the curbe in time) and almost falling over something that I think was a bike rack right in the centre of town.
by the time I eventually reached the supermarket, I just wanted to curl up in a corner and never emerge again.

Fortunately the staff member in my house had rung a colleague in another house to ask if she could act as backup, in case it all went pear-shaped, so I did have somewhere to turn. I ended up calling her to come and rescue me, as I just couldn’t face going all the way back by myself.

With hindsight, I think it was mainly because I was already nervous and tense, that it got to me so badly. I’d normally just get a bit pissed off about the bright spark who left that bike/car/container/whatever slap bang in the middle of the pavement, give it a wallop with my cane and navigate round it.
Still, there’s a first time – or in my case, first time after a long break – for everything. But I have learnt one thing: to always have my mobile with me. 😉

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